We have a new comment on the very first of these postings, ‘Coping With Ageing’in October 2005. There are now 22 comments on this particular blog in the Spanish version, and this latest one is from Marcos who lives in Argentina. It is so valuable that I want to share it with our English readers.
“ I am 62 and Argentinian. I think Bryan is right when he says “Ageing is more than feeling old”. Sometimes we feel like we are ageing but later, along time, physical and sometimes mental things happen. Only our spirit (or our “X” – each person can have a different word to describe it) is ageless. I think that humans – each man and woman – chooses whether to dwell on our dark side or our lighter side.
I would like to express my cordiality to all those who participate in this blog. I have noticed spontaneity and internal honesty.
If you would allow me to, I would like to share with you a project that we have with some colleagues – to create a group of mutual help called APREN (learn how best not to age).
It is free (as in no cost), confidential and free (as in unconstrained). I remember the conversation I had with a colleague when I suggested the idea of APREN to him. I said it would be a group to “learn how to age”. No! he said “How can you learn how to age? I think it should be learn how not to age”. This led to a discussion more or less like this:
I said, why add ‘not to’? As well as being crazy, what have you got against ageing? Why do you deny something that is so vital, important and irreversible? ” etc etc. And he answered “No, for me ageing and living are two separate courses. Yo, as I age, I live, I ENJOY (in capital letters)”. I reflected on his words and the next week I told him I agreed with him. Happy now, he responded by saying he enjoyed being among young people, listening to music, walking, reading, studying, doing things… I have shared this conversation with you because now this friend lives in my heart.
I later discovered that even before our dialogue, he had been told that he had a malignant tumour in his intestine.
I wish all of you health (in the widest sense of the meaning) and internal peace!.”
I think I want to agree with both points of view. You have no choice about this; ageing is something you have to learn to cope with. It is a new experience and often an unwelcome one. But ’the spirit’ is ageless and Marcos’s friend is right about enjoying the good things of life, especially where possible in the company of younger people.
Many thanks to Marcos.